Monday, April 29, 2013

Do the right thing.

Vikings fans,

If you want Minnesota to get rid of Chris Kluwe because he is a sub-standard football player, fine.  I think he's a good punter and he did a great job as a holder for rookie kicker Blair Walsh this season.  The Vikes went 10-6 and made the playoffs because every single guy on that team did his job well.

If you want Minnesota to get rid of Chris Kluwe because he is overpaid, fine.  He only made $1.3 million last year, while the minimum NFL salary is $405K for a rookie and $840K for someone with Kluwe's 9 years of experience, and the Vikes have more than five million in cap space for 2013.  I think they can afford him for one more season.

If you want Minnesota to get rid of Chris Kluwe because he has the balls to speak his mind and fight for the LGBTQ to have all the same rights as he does, especially the right to marry, go to hell.  The guy is not some sort of basket case, like Randy Moss was, and the Vikings brought HIM back.  Kluwe's only crime here is that the guy is a decent human being.

And if you're one of those bigots crying foul over NBA center Jason Collins, who just came out of the closet, making him the first openly gay man in the four major North American professional sports, I really hope your god shows you the same love and mercy that you should be showing for all people on this earth.

Zygi Wilf, Rick Spielman, Leslie Frazer, whatever you do, it better be for the right reasons.  Because if you do not do the right thing, you'll lose me as a potential fan.


Friday, March 29, 2013

Just keep it to yourself

OK, yeah, the #2 seeded University of Minnesota Golden Gophers Men's Hockey team got beat by #15 Yale today in the NCAA playoffs.  But for you North Dakota fans, here are a few things to keep in mind while you're celebrating...

First of all, being my friend is not a right.  IT'S A PRIVILEGE.  If you want to brag about Minnesota's shortcomings, keep it on your Facebook wall and off mine.  I would not do the same if the situation was reversed.  Sure, I'd brag on my page, but it's MY page.  I can do that.  If you can't respect this, then you can't be my friend anymore.

Second, do you know how bad this makes you?  Trolling for hate by poking at the bear like that?  Contrary to popular belief, Facebook IS NOT a public forum, especially the little tiny corner of it that is mine.  But if you think it should be, then you better follow Wheaton's law:  DON'T BE A DICK.  Well said, Mr. Crusher.

Now, I know at this point, some of you might be saying, "Geez, Paul, lighten up.  It's only a game/sport."  Hypocrite.  If it was only a game, why are YOU getting so excited about it.  Sports, along with pretty much every other media outlet, be it television, movies, music, books...  They exist in part to allow us to escape from the real world, even if it's only temporarily.  I'm sure every person on this earth who is fortunate enough to live in a society like ours has bitched at least ONCE about some plot twist, some re-imaging, some THING that disrupts their idyllic fantasy world in a way that is most unpleasent.  You know you have, and denying it just makes you look even more guilty of it.

But hey, if you want to pat yourselves on the back, even though UND hasn't WON anything (yet), by all means, go ahead and stroke it.  Just don't be coming all over me, you sick perverts.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

What in the World (of Warcraft)...?

Yes, the rumors were true, I had been playing World of Warcraft again.


I pulled the trigger on a 10-day free trial, and you know what I found out? Blizzard put the game on easy mode.

It was not tough to do quests, because they show you where to go on the map and who to kill to complete them. Dungeons required no effort, because they show where each boss is, and you can constantly pull enemies into combat. It cut the time of a crawl down from 120 minutes to 20 minutes. Leveing up is cake too, because now you get experience from picking herbs and mining for ore.

It's disgusting. When I first played WoW, it required a lot of effort to get tuned up to go to the Molten Core. Now? I bet my four-year-old nephew could get up to level 90 in a matter of hours.

I think, with no proof once so ever, Blizz caved into the whiners (Lerrilin) who wanted to access ALL the game content that came with their $15 monthly subscription. Goddamn millenials and their sense of entitlement...

Sorry, Clint, Chris, and Cynthia, but I'm not coming back on a permanent basis. I just don't think it's worth it. Besides, I've got more important stuff to do. My girlfriend is moving in with me, I'm applying to the MBA program at the University of Minnesota, and I've got some team to cheer for.

I love you guys, and I want to come back to play with you again, because I feel I've got some unfinished business to take care of in Azeroth. But right now? I've got some real-life quests to complete...
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