WANTED: New owners

It's June in United States, which means it's time to fish or cut bait in Major League Baseball.  Unfortunately, the Minnesota Twins are going to cut bait.  AGAIN.

I've so fucking sick and tired of the Pohlad family running that team into the ground.  I refuse to watch any more games until they get new ownership, which will probably happen about a quarter to...  NEVER.

Here's my top ten for who'd make better owners than the descendants of Carl Pohlad, who made his fortune foreclosing farms in the North Star State during the Great Depression

10.    The dead corpse of Kirby Puckett.  Sure, he did some fucked up shit before he left the organization in 2002, but his bones or ashes or whatever became of his body has already done a better job of running the Twins than Carl, Jim, Tom, or even Eloise has ever or will ever done.

9.    Rachel Phelps.  The fictional owner of the Cleveland Indians in the "Major League" series of comedy films from the late '80s and early '90s who wanted to get the attendance of the team so low that it'd absolve the team of their contract with Cleveland Municipal Stadium and allow them to move to Miami.  She was a real piece of shit, but at least she inspired her team to win just to spite her.

Apparently, Calvin Griffin, former owner of the Twins before he sold them to Carl circa 1984, was the inspiration for first movie "Major League", as he had an escape clause after the Twins moved into the Metrodome where *HE* could move the team out of Minneapolis if *THEIR* attendance sufficiently dropped.

8.    Grand Nagus Rom.  You're going to notice a pattern here with most of the names on this list...

If you didn't follow Star Trek, he became the head of the ultracapitalist Ferengi society after Zek, the previous Grand Nagus retired to be with his (Rom's) mother.  Before Zek's retirement, his Ferengi brethren were some of the most sexist, chauvinistic, and greedy people in the Milky Way galaxy, but Rom, as their new leader of commerce was going to bring MASSIVE changes to their society, much to the chagrin of his old, stereotypical Ferengi brother Quark.

Being as atypical of his species as possible, he'd do a much better job of running the Twins than any Pohlad EVER.

7.    Buddy.  He's one of the two cats my wife Amy and I own.  He'd six years old, and a complete brain case.  We joke he only has a single brain cell, and that's being AWFULLY generous.  He gets scared of everything, including but not limited to, his own shadow, Daisy (the other cat we own), loud noises, the lightning storms in his head, his toys, his food, and himself.  Regardless, he couldn't do any WORSE than a Pohlad.

6.    Alex Rodriguez.

I hate the guy.  The steroids, playing for the Yankees...  I'm sure I have other reasons for hating him..

He co-owns the Minnesota Timberwolves, and they've been fairly good the last couple of years, so it's not like he's TOTALLY incompetent, and hopefully that's because he keeps his hands off.  Additionally, he's one of the few people on this earth is MORE hated than current Twins ownership.

5.    The Joker.  Yup, the Clown Prince of Crime from Gotham, whose primary role in the DC Universe is to cause havoc and destruction for Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, and the rest of the DC universe have to combat on a regular basis.  Still, he also COULD NOT DO ANY WORSE than the Two Faced villains currently in charge.

4.    Luke Edwards.  The former child actor played Billy Heywood in "Little Big League", where he inherited ownership of the Twins after his grandfather, team owner Thomas Heywood (played by Jason Robards) passes away.  After becoming owner, he installed himself as team manager after firing Dennis Farina's character and lead them to a one game playoff against the Seattle Mariners for the American League Wild Card spot.  That's good enough in my book in terms of qualifications for ownership, especially compared to the little "men" currently in possession of the Twin Cities' MLB team.

He's also got the benefit of his mother being played by Ashley Crow, the ACTUAL mother of current Chicago Cub Peter Crow-Armstrong.

3.    A.J. Pierzynski.  Sure, he kinda became a villain in Minnesota after he became a Chicago White Sox, and especially after he got a World Series ring with them in 2005, after a local kid took his spot behind the plate (Joe Mauer).  But I'd still pick Anthony John Pierzynski over Carl and his ilk.

2.    Roger Dorn.  The last fictional character on our list, he ACTUALLY became owner of the Twins in the direct to video "Major League: Back to the Minors" release starring Scott Bakula.  He might have had a shortstop and a second baseman who hadn't turned a double play in nearly a month because one had a bigger shoe contract than the other, but Twins issues were peanuts compared to what is happening in the Minnesota front office and their balance sheets right now.

1.    ME!!   Seriously, I could do a much better job with a single nickel, which is way lessthan what the Twins are worth right now (and the hundreds of millions the Pohlads' want for their squad in the open market).  Five cents may be OVERPRICED, given how well the Twins have done since they set Target Field on fire nearly a year ago.  But I'm sure I could do more with that nickel than the Pohlad clan have ever done with their BILLIONS...

I lost a LEGO piece... MAYBE...

 I may have lost a LEGO piece, and it's fucking up my mind 6 ways to Sunday...

I've been working for a number of years to build a Pyramid Nightclub.  And I may have lost a 1x1x6 Column, Piece #43888, Bright Yellow that is a support piece for the roof to the entrance to the club.  It's somewhere in my house between the LEGO room (where I keep 95% of my collection) and the living room.  I know it's in the house, because that stuff never leaves my residence once it enters my plastic Thunderdome.  i probably have to tear apart both rooms to see where it is.

But that's not the worst of it.  The worst of it is that is my obsession with trying to figure out where it is.

LEGO doesn't currently have that part in that color in their online store.

The voice in my head doesn't want to let me rest until I find it.

The piece is cheap, only a few cents.  I can easily order a new one and get it in a handful of days.  But that's not the point.

I overthink everything.  I hate leaving things unfinished.  I spent nearly all of April trying to work to clean up my music collection.  I got it done, but it kept my mind awake trying to figure out how I can return to a state similar to how I had it in late May 2019 before moving to California.

Once I complete one major project, I feel the need to move onto the next one. It never ends.

I should seek professional help.  Maybe I will in a few days...

Until then, I will not rest...  Because I can't...

I put the OCD in CD…

Before I moved to California with my wife, I kept a meticulous SQL database of all my legally obtained music…

Before we got our house, I let it fall by the wayside because I didn't have the time or space to work with it…

Over the past several months, I've been picking it back up and returning order to that chaos.  I think I’ve identified everything, so I can load it back into my database.  There were about 7500 songs in it before I left Minnesota, and now I’m around 8650.

I know no one else cares about it, but it is important TO ME.  It's tough when my mind starts getting on my case about the mess that it is, but I think I’m seeing the light at the end of the tunnel now.  I just need to remind myself to be kinder to me…

I also know self-diagnosing myself with OCD is not the same as medical professionals telling some person that they have *ACTUAL* obsessive compulsive disorder.  It's probably something I shouldn't be joking about.  I'm not on the same level as Michael J. Fox's character in the third season of "Scrubs".

Fortunately, I have today off of work, so I can spend my afternoon cleaning up my database of music.  Wish me luck...

Call your loved ones and tell them you love them, because the world is coming to an end…

AGAIN!!!

Moorhead High School in Minnesota REPEATS as state champions at the highest level (AA).

A 5-4 winner over Minnetonka IN DOUBLE OVERTIME.

They had lost in the champion game EIGHT TIMES since 1991, but to win TWO IN A ROW?!??

**WE.  ARE.  BONED.**

I expect the world to explode at any moment…

If Moorhead winning twice in a row isn’t unlocking the seventh seal to hell, I don’t know what is…

If you wanna check out the game-winning gold, here's the link: https://youtu.be/0X2-GukYFMI?si=SIH7DmZdECwE8eKS

Thanks, that was fun

WAS fun...

The 2026 Winter Olympics are over.  And it ended exceptionally well.  For the first time in my lifetime, the United States of America won gold, scoring the game winning goal in overtime over Canada.

It was a great thing to see.  Until some lifesize assholes decided to politicize it.

The head of the FBI, who had no BUSINESSS being there, crashes the celebration in the locker room and helps himself to a beer.

Then the president calls to congratulate the team.  and complains about the women's team, WHO ALSO WON GOLD IN OVERTIME, wanting equal time.  Or any time really...

Never at any point was it about the athletes' accomplishments.  It was about the powers that be, what THEY wanted, what THEY thought THEY deserved...

Worse, some of the men accepted the orange one's invitation to the White House on their way back to play in the NHL.  Some as early as TOMORROW...

The women did not accept their invite, but Flavor Flav has them covered.  He'll hold a celebration with them once their season is done in...  May? (I assume that's when the PWHL is done for the year).  Some of them have to go back to school, as they are still playing in the NCAA.  Their season will be done in a few weeks, but they'll still be working for degrees at their various universities, and (I assume) will not be done until May (as well).

It's no skin off my ass.  I don't watch the NHL.  Haven't since they cancelled the 2004-05 season.  They don't need my money either.

I'd love to be in Vegas when Flav honors the women's team this summer.  Considering how he's celebrated the accomplishments of others, I'd love to see it go down.

If I end up dead after this is published, I'm also posting it on Discord and Tumblr.  Good luck trying to remove it from there...

Slow progress is still progress

 I see people on social media sites complaining about the University of Minnesota Golden Gophers  minor bowls against middle of the road teams and say that P.J. Fleck doesn't deserve the credit he gets after leading them to their NINTH consecutive victory.

Would you prefer that they NOT play bowl games and maybe only win two or three games a year?!?!

Yes, they've got a long way to go to get up to the national level with the likes of Michigan, Ohio State, and Penn State, but do you really wanna deal with those headaches that come with being the big dogs?

I know Michigan and Ohio State have won the last two NCAA "national championships".  And the hill got MUCH steeper when Oregon and USC joined the Big Ten.

For now, I'm good with no longer being the punching bags, the laughing stocks, or the runts of the litter.  People have to give them a *LITTLE* respect, and those iotas are much greater than zero.

Can Minnesota do better?  Yes, they could.  It's gonna take time.  And I've got plenty of patience.  Gopher football season is no longer the "wait until hockey starts" transition period between the start of the school year and the puck drops at Mariucci and Ridder Arenas.  It means something now.  I'll gladly take that.

It take time to become golden.  But compared to what they were in the days before they started rowing the boat?  I'll gladly be not shit...

Row the boat, Ski-U-Mah, and Go Gophers.

So what'cha want?

Adam, Adam, and Mike tried to warn the record companies ~30 years ago.

The only people who need record companies are the artists TO HELP PROMOTE THEIR BANDS.

Albums help sell tickets to shows, which is where musicians make their money. But now that the shoe is on the other foot, where bands can start their own labels, work directly with studios, and can cut the big name producers out of their equation.

There is no need for a middleman anymore.

Technology helped too. Thanks to the iPod eventually becoming big enough to hold entire PERSONAL libraries of music, why do you need to listen to SOMEONE ELSE'S collection?

Need recommendations for new music? Ask a friend. 

And the whole Napster fiasco? It showed record companies only cared about their bottom lines. 

Music, and making albums, adds to their wealth, so they can sign more bands and make more recordings increase their IP catalog.

Once the albums are stamped, they'll license their productions out where they can make their bucks. 

Who needs record companies? Investors, and that's it...

I think I found my TRUE, TRUE calling in life...

 After spending the last few days...

WEEKS, really...

OK, YEARS...

...Thinking about all the various personal projects I've started working on, all the notes I've compiled, all the drawing I've come up with, files upon files UPON FILES of data on my PC's...

I think my true, TRUE, passion in life is world building.

I've been kicking around some relatively recent thoughts and ideas about a story I've been trying to write for years now.  All the LEGO sets I've bought and brainstorming about integrating them into a single, grand unified theory of "what story am I trying to tell with all of them"...  Pages and pages of notes, playing through countless video games, putting together playlists of songs, countless digital notes, scratching my head wondering what's behind the next door and picturing the next adventure...

It all comes back to the same question: "What comes next?"

Science fiction, fiction, articles, books, music, art, images, hundreds, thousands, millions,  BILLIONS of ones and zeroes.  They continue to add up to the same result:

I need to fill in the blanks.  Either in your narrative or one of my own.

As I keep dumping ideas into one hole, another one appears (or two or three of a bazillion) more appear.  So I have to fill in those gaps.  I try to fill them in, and more appear.  It's like my brain in playing an endless game of whack-a-mole.

And one just isn't enough.  I've got a whole unused hand awaiting assignmment, so why not play two games at once?

Feet?!?!  Sure, go for three!!

But wait, sit down and use the other foot!!  THAT'S FOUR1!

Whack-A-Mole isn't that hard.  It doesn't take much brain power, IT CAN PLAY MENTAL WHACK-A-MOLE!!  FIVE!!

Am I overthinking this?!?!  YOU'RE ONLY ASKING THIS NOW?!?!?!

It goes on, and on, and...  Well, you get the idea...

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to collect my tickets before I start my next game...

Can you do it?

 I’m dusting off the ol’ blog to post some personal insights and views to share with whomever *MIGHT* be reading.  Here’s one I wrote last summer:

Between all the recent celebrations of diversity and the great things life has delivered to us, between the Juneteenth and Negro Leagues Baseball and Pride events, I will continue to do what I can to help share their wonderful contributions to this world.

In my eyes, if you can do the job, then you are welcome on my team.  If you’re willing to roll up your sleeves and learn how to be of assistance, I’ll gladly teach you.

Skin color, sexual orientation, gender and gender identity?  Details.  If you’d like me to celebrate it with you, I’ll do my best.  And please let know if I’m not doing it right.  I’m sure I still have a lot to learn.

A rising tide lifts all boats.  Let’s get on board and set out for adventure.

Even though I’ve been going through life on one of the easier difficulty settings (straight white male, but not *THE* easiest, as I’ve never been an obscenely rich white male) it hasn’t been *THAT* easy.

After I turned nine (9), people had a problem with who I was, and most of them felt the need to try to constantly tear me down for their own entertainment.

Fuck those assholes.  I hope karma comes around to bite them on the ass so hard they have to be put on a waiting list for a new buttocks transplant.

In the words of Elton John, “I’m still standin’ better than I ever did.  Looking like a true survivor.  Feelin’ like a little kid.  And I’m still standin’ after all this time.  Pickin’ up the pieces of my life without you on my mind.”

Although you are still on my mind, I’m using it as the inspiration for a fictional story I’m writing.

If, by some incredible miracle, I make some money off it, I’ll buy a plane ticket for you TO COME KISS MY FUCKING ASS!!!

So, at the beginning of their journeys, Professor Oak gives “Red” Ash Ketchum and Gary “Blue” Oak a Pokédex each, with data about all 149 species of Pokemon known to exist in the Kanto region. But the data on those devices is locked behind a system that somehow senses the Pokemon they each had caught AND seen, with no apparent explanation (to my knowledge) how THE DEVICE knows.

I know it's a video game (and a anime cartoon based on it), which became a new cornerstone to the Nintendo empire that's been pretty much killing it in the video game industry since the early 1980's, so you should take it with a grain of salt, but it is a valid question.

If you've watched the anime and know the explanation for such a GAPING plot hole, please let me know if a video clip exists somewhere to fill in that hole.

Anyway, if I had a similar device with cell phone like capability that automatically unlocks data about magic animals that are electronically stored in tiny little colorful balls, years before the actual technology exists...

I suppose that's something we have "Star Trek: The Next Generation" to thank for.  Thanks to that future focused show, they had characters hanging out and enjoying down time in a virtual reality where technology could do shit that we could only DREAM about...

Yes, I'm putting too much thought into this.  And yes, I'm probably not the first person to wonder about this.  I'm sure Nintendo is cool with us discussing this, as they get to reap the rewards.  "Some dude is talking about our multibillion dollar franchise on a blog?  And he's been a loyal customer for thirty-five years?  Sure, we're cool with it."

Don't expect me to start eating mushrooms or climbing down green pipes...